Diagnose: Leben mit Vaginismus<\/a><\/h3>I then googled a lot and found nothing for a long time until I finally read about vaginismus<\/a> and felt seen for the first time. Until then I thought I was the only freak in the world with this embarrassing problem. The diagnosis was later confirmed by a doctor.<\/p>What are your experiences with doctors?<\/h3>
The first gynecologist I went to with my problem, without knowing the name vaginismus at that time, unfortunately did not know what it was. When I sat on the chair with my legs apart, she said \u2018You have to relax now, I can\u2019t examine you like this and you shouldn\u2019t be surprised that no penis is going in there\u2019. In the end I got the tip to insert a mini tampon with lubricant<\/a>. That wasn\u2019t even the worst advice compared to what other patients hear from their doctors \u2013 like \u2018have a glass of wine\u2019. Nevertheless, her rude nature and lack of understanding got me so upset that for a long time I simply ignored my problem.<\/p>Even the specialist wasn\u2019t able to help<\/h3>
Later I found a supposed specialist. He prescribed me some lotions and a balloon that you insert and inflate \u2013 actually intended for pregnant women to prepare for giving birth. At that time I couldn\u2019t even get a little finger inside my vagina. So his method of treatment did not work, but he could not offer me an alternative either.<\/p>
Which symptoms do you have?<\/h3>
Inserting something into my vagina usually does not work at all or only under severe pain. Penetrating sex is still not possible, I stay away from specula<\/a> during my gynaecology visit and I do not even think about tampons. However, I have already made progress and can now introduce the third of five dilators.<\/p><\/ul><\/div>\n\n<\/ul><\/div><\/div>Which treatment options have you already given a try? <\/h3>
Dilators, physiotherapy and psychotherapy help me. Dilators are dildo\u2019s that are scaled according to size, which you insert yourself and thus practice getting the vagina used to a painless penetration. This can also be called circlusion<\/a>, which I like even better as a term because it focuses on actively enclosing or taking up the vagina instead of being passive. With dilators, it is helpful to use a mirror to see the entrance of the vagina and combine it with relaxing things like meditation, a hot bath or masturbation. Then you slowly work your way up to the next size, but this should never hurt, because you want to break the cycle of pain. In vaginismus, a connection of penetration=pain has been established in the body. By experiencing more and more often a painless penetration, this connection is overwritten in the pain memory. <\/p>Living with vaginismus: Dilators, physiotherapy & psychotherapy<\/h4>
Additionally it is helpful for me to learn in physiotherapy how the pelvic floor works and how to relax it. In psychotherapy I talk about the mental side, i.e. the effects on my mind and also about possible triggers. <\/p>
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/www.vulvani.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/Themenabend-11.02.2020-10-1024x1024.png\")
Photo Credits: Leonie<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>How has your life changed since you learned that you have vaginismus?<\/h3>
I was absolutely relieved to find out that there is a name for this strange and terrible pain. From then on I was able to look for help and I also found some things I am now making progress with.
My boyfriend, my mother and some very good girlfriends know about it. Otherwise I keep a low profile. For one thing, because I don\u2019t necessarily talk about sex in general with other people, but also because it is still very stigmatized.
<\/p>
How does living with vaginismus influence your everyday life?<\/h3>
I haven\u2019t been to a gynaecologist for a very long time because I have had bad experiences and I haven\u2019t let any speculum near me until now. Otherwise I still can\u2019t have penetrating sex and so I find other ways to have fun with my boyfriend. But this also has its good sides. I have learned to communicate boundaries and to become creative. My therapist once said \u201cPeople with sexual dysfunction are better in bed\u201d. <\/p>
Why did you decide to start your Instagram account? <\/h3>
I learned most of what I know from other people having vaginismus through an English speaking Facebook group. Unfortunately, there are very few sources or information in German. Therefore I eventually decided to do it myself<\/a>. Although I can\u2019t show anyone the queen\u2019s way of healing (which doesn\u2019t exist either), I can show what it feels like for me and that no one is alone with vaginismus.<\/p>
What are your experiences with doctors?<\/h3>
The first gynecologist I went to with my problem, without knowing the name vaginismus at that time, unfortunately did not know what it was. When I sat on the chair with my legs apart, she said \u2018You have to relax now, I can\u2019t examine you like this and you shouldn\u2019t be surprised that no penis is going in there\u2019. In the end I got the tip to insert a mini tampon with lubricant<\/a>. That wasn\u2019t even the worst advice compared to what other patients hear from their doctors \u2013 like \u2018have a glass of wine\u2019. Nevertheless, her rude nature and lack of understanding got me so upset that for a long time I simply ignored my problem.<\/p> Later I found a supposed specialist. He prescribed me some lotions and a balloon that you insert and inflate \u2013 actually intended for pregnant women to prepare for giving birth. At that time I couldn\u2019t even get a little finger inside my vagina. So his method of treatment did not work, but he could not offer me an alternative either.<\/p> Inserting something into my vagina usually does not work at all or only under severe pain. Penetrating sex is still not possible, I stay away from specula<\/a> during my gynaecology visit and I do not even think about tampons. However, I have already made progress and can now introduce the third of five dilators.<\/p> Dilators, physiotherapy and psychotherapy help me. Dilators are dildo\u2019s that are scaled according to size, which you insert yourself and thus practice getting the vagina used to a painless penetration. This can also be called circlusion<\/a>, which I like even better as a term because it focuses on actively enclosing or taking up the vagina instead of being passive. With dilators, it is helpful to use a mirror to see the entrance of the vagina and combine it with relaxing things like meditation, a hot bath or masturbation. Then you slowly work your way up to the next size, but this should never hurt, because you want to break the cycle of pain. In vaginismus, a connection of penetration=pain has been established in the body. By experiencing more and more often a painless penetration, this connection is overwritten in the pain memory. <\/p> Additionally it is helpful for me to learn in physiotherapy how the pelvic floor works and how to relax it. In psychotherapy I talk about the mental side, i.e. the effects on my mind and also about possible triggers. <\/p> I was absolutely relieved to find out that there is a name for this strange and terrible pain. From then on I was able to look for help and I also found some things I am now making progress with. I haven\u2019t been to a gynaecologist for a very long time because I have had bad experiences and I haven\u2019t let any speculum near me until now. Otherwise I still can\u2019t have penetrating sex and so I find other ways to have fun with my boyfriend. But this also has its good sides. I have learned to communicate boundaries and to become creative. My therapist once said \u201cPeople with sexual dysfunction are better in bed\u201d. <\/p> I learned most of what I know from other people having vaginismus through an English speaking Facebook group. Unfortunately, there are very few sources or information in German. Therefore I eventually decided to do it myself<\/a>. Although I can\u2019t show anyone the queen\u2019s way of healing (which doesn\u2019t exist either), I can show what it feels like for me and that no one is alone with vaginismus.<\/p>Even the specialist wasn\u2019t able to help<\/h3>
Which symptoms do you have?<\/h3>
<\/ul><\/div>\n\n
<\/ul><\/div><\/div>
Which treatment options have you already given a try? <\/h3>
Living with vaginismus: Dilators, physiotherapy & psychotherapy<\/h4>
How has your life changed since you learned that you have vaginismus?<\/h3>
My boyfriend, my mother and some very good girlfriends know about it. Otherwise I keep a low profile. For one thing, because I don\u2019t necessarily talk about sex in general with other people, but also because it is still very stigmatized.
<\/p>How does living with vaginismus influence your everyday life?<\/h3>
Why did you decide to start your Instagram account? <\/h3>